Listen for Productive Interactions

Are you listening, really listening when you're in a meeting? If you are, you're one of 30% of the people who listen in a meeting – including 1 on 1 with your significant other. You will be engaged if you really listen. Like this photo you link with others when you're engaged. Successful people share the trait of really listening. Those folks are successful in business and in relationships.

How do you know if you're listening? Here are a few of ways:

• You don't have any distractions such as a cell phone, a blackberry, or computer active.
• You make eye contact with the speaker most of the time.
• You ask questions that summarize what you heard and confirm that you understand what the speaker is meaning to say. The speaker responds saying you're on target perhaps replying, "Exactly."

Take a minute and think of times you haven't been heard. This is the 'other side of the coin' and usually more personal and impactful. This is what you don't want to do or have done to you:

• Multitask with the conversation being one of the things your attention is spread across
• Have a side conversation during a main conversation
• Look away from the other person most of the time
• Interrupt to say what popped into your mind
• Ask the person to repeat what they just said more than once

Think you're a good listener? Ask your spouse, boy/girlfriend, kids, co-workers. The impact of honest answers is worth the risk of asking.

 

Comments

[Chris]

I don't believe that eye contact equates to listening.

Honestly there are many people who shy away from eye contact for a number of reasons. In Asian cultures this can be seen as disrespectful or challenging the other's rank if looking them directly in the eyes all the time.

I understand in American society, we view it as someone is paying attention to us, but I know many people that have trouble keeping eye contact but are one of the most detail-oriented when it comes to recalling previous conversations.

[Shawn]

Here is a link to a book geard toward pastors but very applicable in the business world to help hone listening skills.

Hearing Beyond Words by Dr. Emma Justes

http://www.amazon.com/Hearing-Beyond-Words-Become-Listening/dp/0687494990/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1222188141&sr=8-1